All the commenters think this guy is a douchebag, but I think it’s the most brilliant humor piece that short I’ve ever read. Making the jump from “I get laid a lot” to “I miss masturbation” is a perfect example of the old comedy maxim: “Start off going in one direction, then go somewhere comepletely different. Like Kansas.”

P.S.: Bonus laughs from noticing that man of the commenters are too stupid to realize he’s making a joke. That kind of thing is especially close to my heart, given how many idiots have tried to tear me down by mentioning my blog’s name.